Perils of Childhood 1970's

I have some experience of the new global craze of Pokemon Go!.

This is not from the actual playing of the mobile/GPS based game but rather just avoiding crashing into a car on my bike that suddenly stooped in the middle of a busy main road whilst its occupants pursued a virtual Pokemon figure which must have simultaneously appeared on their screens.

Such is the danger when modern technology is marketed to the masses as a leisure pursuit.

This level of peril has in fact always been the case where toys and the latest crazes have been concerned.

My own childhood years in the late 1960's and 1970's were no different although perhaps just that little bit more hazardous given the toxic and carcinogenic composition of the early plastics and paints from which the toys of that era were fashioned.

Most bore the words "Made in Hong Kong" which should have caused parental alarm bells to ring about standards and safety of manufacture and materials but the dominance of that UK Colony in the toy sector placed it beyond reproach or criticism.

Looking back I am amazed that a good proportion of my generation survived the period of their childhood faced with exposure to such dangers in the toy box, notwithstanding what, with the luxury of hindsight, was also an bit of an iffy time for foodstuffs, medicines, aluminium cooking utensils and passive ingestion of cigarette smoke.

Oh, I forgot to mention the threat of nuclear war, smallpox and lead in the atmosphere from car exhaust fumes.

The intrusion of Health and Safety into everyday life, and in particular that of children was minimal in my formative years and yet we seem to have emerged into adulthood bearing little ill affects, perhaps with characteristics of resilience and acceptance over previous and indeed successive generations.

To illustrate what we were up against in those past decades and particularly to those now in their 20's, 30's and even into their 40's I provide a list, in no particular order, of the types and brands of toys, games and pastimes that could at anytime have cut short our promising youthful existence.

Sock Monkeys - promoting unrealistic and benign attitude to Primates
Fuzzy Felt- choking hazard from small parts
Easy Bake Oven- making a real cooking appliance seem harmless
Chemistry Set- unwitting bomb making
Frisbee- risk of falling out of a tree or being frazzled on electricity transformer when trying to retrieve
Gonks- fire hazard
Rubber Power Balls- likelihood of impact damage to soft tissue and eyes
Stylophone- making a celebrity endorsement fully acceptable
Cork Pop Guns- aid to developing poor attitude to targeting of pets
Wooden stilts- broken limbs
Shrinky Dinks- burn and scalding hazard
Cap Guns- unhealthy attitude to gun violence
Jelly Shoes- no arch support or protection from falling masonry
Weebles- they wobble and fall down
Pez Dispensers- high sugar and E-number exposure
Cabbage Patch Dolls- just plain creepy and nightmare inducing
Bionic Man Merchandise- promoting way too high expectations of physical ability
Rollerskates- responsible for many later in life limb and muscle ailments
Etch a Sketch- poor artistic appreciation
Top Trumps- encouraging unhealthy competition and one-up-manship
Robinsons Golly Figurines- introduction to racial stereotypes
Bullworker- contributing to arthritis 50 years after last used
Barrel of Monkeys- another example of disrespect for wildlife
Marbles- trip and choking risk
Jacks or Five-Stones - Rhuematics inducing from sitting on cold playground surface
Evel Knievel Stunt Bike- not representative of what can be done on a child'd pedal cycle
Silly String- just messy
Clackers- actually banned from my junior school
Conkers- knuckle bashing and contributing to eye injuries
Hula Hoops- hip displacement to be expected when reaching aged 60 plus
Gifts in cereal packets- risk of violence amongst siblings
Action Man- militaristic and violent
Plastic Meccano Set- Structures cannot be used to take the weight of a child
Electric Train Set- electrocution and fire hazard
Squelches- misleading information for children
Space Hopper- risk of being thrown into the path of moving traffic if out of control on Pez sweets
Raleigh Chopper- complete death trap and hard to ride anyway
Stickle Bricks- painful if stood on
Wade Miniatures- very uspetting if smashed by jealous sibling
Walkie Talkies- sanctions imposed for interrupting legitimate emergency services communications
String connected bean tins - strangulation and finger severance risk
Airfix models- small parts, addictive glue/cement, toxic gloss paints
Hot Wheels, Husky, Dinky, Corgi, Matchbox Cars- slippery under foot
Slinky- encouraging hazardous playing on staircase
3D Collectors Cards from petrol purchases- intense stress from incomplete set
Collectible Coinsets from petrol purchases- not to be put into vending machines in lieu of money
Football Cards- encourages compulsive disorders
Cards found in boxes of loose or tea bags- contamination from tea
Spirograp- sharp edges
Tonka Toys- road hazard from tendency to run away onto the highway
Magnetic Face Creation- exposure to iron filings
Assorted Magnets- taking risks to reach things to see if magnetic
Rubiks Cube- 50 years of misery to try to complete a second side
Pogo Stick- downright stupid, limb jarring, unpredictable
Stretch Armstrong- whiplash risk
Soda Stream- too much CO2
Hacky Sack- a bit sad anyway
Kaleidoscope- eye strain, conspiracy theorists blame early involvement of SpecSavers.
Pet Hamster- early experience of mortality or eyeballs falling out unnannounced

I am sure that there are many more. Please let me know if you feel that you have,like me, had a lucky escape from the perils of childhood in the 1970's