Well meaning double speak

There are many, many books, tutorials, courses and study guides on how to create that one in a million plot line for a novel or movie.

The following is not, I stress, any of my doing but has been the backbone of a long running series of British Films over the last six decades.

It goes like this.

A rag tag group or people, earnest and well meaning find themselves confronted by very trying circumstances. They are pushed to the absolute limit, they almost give in but eventually come through, excel in what they are doing and then walk away modestly.

You may have a strange feeling of familiarity, deja-vu and a warm feeling of fondness for the emotion and sentiment that such a human struggle engenders. Have a good long search into your brain hard drive in search of an explanation for this. You may be shocked and dismayed when I tell you that if you indeed experience such things it distinguishes you as an officianado, albeit subconsciously of the Carry On movies which this August (2018) are 60 years old.

Since 1958 this plot construct has been adapted, turned upside down and back to front, ignored, revitalised and re-invented but with the same broad outcome of rip-roaring comedy.

Add in a bit of fun, risque subject matter, double-entendres and stereotypical behaviour and you have an enduring set of 30* movies over the following 20 years that continue to be broadcast and enjoyed on a multi-national and multi-generational scale and globally.

The writer behind the first six Carry On films, Norman Hudis was the person who devised the classic story framework before handing over to Talbot Rothwell and other writers and the constants of Gerald Thomas and Peter Rogers as Director and Producer respectively.

The films have assumed a sort of cult status today and it is possible to study at notable seats of education and learning the social, political, economic and gender messages that emerge amongst the raucous, randy and riotous scenarios.


In fact the films are now regarded by academics as being a record or social commentary of their times although in a subsequent interview Hudis was sceptical about a deeper meaning and message rather stating that he had just referred to real life situations and experiences and their value in spinning a good tale.

There have of course been ardent critics and cynics of the long running franchise but the box office figures tell a contrasting story of acceptance and appreciation by the general public.

!958 was still a period of austerity in Britain, accentuated by a very monochrome imagery in film and television with smog filled streets, a persistence of rationing of staple goods and a rigid social order of deference and subservience.

An evening or matinee screening of a Carry On at the local picture house will have been a real treat for a good proportion of the downcast nation.

Society was however about to change dramatically with the optimism and freedoms of the swinging sixties and the Carry On story lines were able to take up and run with the trends and popular attitudes but cloaked in historical spoofs, parodies of other genres and generally taking a good old poke (ooh-err Matron) at national traits and characteristics.

I have just realised that I have, over the last four sentences been guilty of over-analysing and over-thinking the whole Carry On ethos giving it an aura of sociological and anthropological importance when in fact it was only ever intended to make people laugh and have a good time.



*not forgetting the 31st film, Carry on Columbus in 1992

Fly Tipping in Medieval Amsterdam

We are very much in a throw-away consumer society. 

We are spoilt by a fantastic choice and range of products and goods with the promise of the latest version of something being the absolute pinnacle of technology and intelligence and yet within a matter of weeks even that revolutionary gadget or gizmo has been superseded by the next best thing and so on. 

I have always had the perception that our ancestors possessed so very little that they cherished and looked after things so much better. 

That idea has to a large degree been ridiculed by the discovery of hundreds of thousands of objects across the Dutch city of Amsterdam which, over its 800 or so year history as a settlement, were dropped or thrown, by accident or intentionally into the canals and waterways that are a major characteristic and landmark of that European Capital. 

The poor handling of generations of citizens came to light during a major civil engineering project to the Metro line over a 9.7km North to South axis which gave archaeologists an unrivalled opportunity to form a cross section of the life and times of Amsterdam over the ages. Construction actually started back in 2003 but such were the complexities and challenges of boring tunnels through soft clay soils and at a depth of 20m to 30m below ground level that the project is, to my understanding, still underway but expected to be completed this year (2018). 

The importance of the archaeological considerations were evident immediately within the scheme and research focused on the vertical excavation pits rather than along the linear run. The profile of the vertical cuts covered landscape periods from 124000 to 10000 BC and various climatic and geological eras including a prehistoric warm sea and deposits from the last ice age. The upper soil layers down to around 12 metres were from 10000 BC to the present day and comprising the peat bog and fen landscape that would be reclaimed for agriculture followed by the founding of Amsterdam around 1200 AD. 

The richest areas of archaeological discoveries were not the solid soils but the streambeds, the bottoms of the natural and man made waterways which had never been built upon or developed. The stretch of open water and a former sea inlet known as the IJ, the River Amstel and canals were all unspoilt territory and began to yield some 700,000 items as unique records of the development of Amsterdam. The shipping history of the area was documented in findings associated with trade and actual vessels ranging from items that probably just fell overboard as well as shipwrecks and parts of boats. 

On shore activities contributed bits of buildings, crafted and manufactured remnants but the biggest category was for items of human origin and use that were lost or dumped and so found their way into the mud and sediments of the watercourses. Illegal disposal of refuse and detritus was a problem as far back as the Medieval period in Amsterdam and indeed all of the rapidly expanding towns and cities across Europe. The network of waterways in the city were obviously very tempting to those looking to get rid of surplus items and general refuse and such fly tipping was widespread given the sheer volume of excavated items during the engineering project. 

The waste from multiple households and businesses as well as the lost property of individuals gave an insight into the rich cultural, economic and social composition of the inhabitants over the ages. 

Past conflicts either defending the city or from aggressors accounted for many military finds from weaponry including cannonballs, bullets, arrowheads and nasty looking daggers to other equipment, uniform buttons, cap badges and regalia. Commercial activities contributed a vast array of coins, tokens, semi or fully finished items of metalwork such as knives and brassware, ceramics and tableware including many fragments of hand painted pottery. Former bridges often included crude toilet amenities over the water and it appears that those frequenting these facilities also took it as an opportunity to discard their debris as well. The bulk of the finds consisted of ceramics (350,491), followed by bone (126,367), metal (91,849), leather (58,597), pipe clay (26,225), glass (21,218) and building ceramics (10,405). The bone discoveries were mainly cow, sheep and goat from slaughter house, tannery sites and a few specialist butchers including Kosher. 

Other categories of finds were labelled under games and recreation and personal artefacts and clothing. 

Some 58 jewellery rings were amongst the finds which must all have had their own story as to how they found their way into the bottom of the watercourse. 

Other items included 55,847 nails, over 6,249 wall tiles, 1,737 roof tiles, 1,186 paving stones and 2,688 window-pane shards.

Portable heating devices, among which were 4,423 braziers and 2,063 chafing dishes were testament to a cold European climate. The sanitary ware included 4,513 chamber pot fragments. Users must have lost their grip on the handle when emptying the pot contents into the river.

In the builders’ hardware category 195 keys and 172 locks were retrieved. Associated with horse-drawn transport were fragments of tackle (220, 114 of which were belt fragments) and horseshoes and farrier nails (110). Modern transport was also represented with finds associated with bicycles (211 fragments) and car remains (75 fragments).

In industrial proccesses sugar production was the most prevalent with 20,384 fragments of sugar jars and funnels and syrup jugs found. Leather processing could be recognised by the 7,780 fragments of production waste, textile processing by almost 3,104 objects associated with sewing, including over 2,805 pins, and metalworking by 1,140 fragments of manufacturing waste. 

In the category of cutting, piercing and splicing tools, such as axes, adzes, drills and files, 531 artefacts were retrieved, and for dyeing and tarring 444 objects. Evidence of pottery making was found in the form of 676 fragments, the majority biscuit ware, a semi-finished product that had been fired but not yet glazed.

Food remains were present in abundance with over 101,697 finds (especially bone waste).

 A further 32,636 finds were associated with beverages and their storage, including over 13,418 mineral water bottles (stoneware) and more than 7,354 wine bottles (glass). Crockery for food preparation accounted for 34,750 finds, some 27,187 of which were cooking pots. Tableware amounted to 35,507 fragments, two-thirds of which were plates. Cutlery was also fairly well represented with more than 2,559 finds, including 713 spoons and 1,394 table knives. In total 26.677 finds were tobacco smoking related, among which 16.485 fragments of clay tobacco pipes.

The 932 objects of the weaponry finds present a chronologically continuous picture from the late Middle Ages to the present. Dating from the early periods are the arrowheads (114) and daggers, including a series of 49 fifteenth-century ballock daggers.The transition to early modern weapons is illustrated by 265 lead bullets, and ends with modern rifle and pistol cartridges from the late nineteenth and twentieth century (58 items), a modern Browning FN-5 pistol and an anti-riot smoke bomb.

At 4,846 objects, the numerically largest group within this category are coins (2,947), ranging from a Roman sestertius to euros. 

A second important group is the lead textile weights (436 items), which afford an insight into the textile trade in the late Middle Ages and the Early Modern Period. 

Various finds are associated with hand-written and printed communication, varying from a wax tablet, stylus, slate pencil, slate and bic ballpoint pen to printing type (180) and the remains (89) of book covers and book clasps from the late Middle Ages and Early Modern Period.

Judging by the numbers found, marbles (550) and ‘throwing bones’ (381) were the playthings children were most likely to lose, Large numbers (345) of miniature toys, such as tin soldiers and children’s crockery (especially plates), were retrieved. Fragments of musical instruments (160) were also found.

The bulk of the clothing lost in the Amstel over the centuries was from leather footwear (42,049 fragments). The second largest group (3,244 finds) consists of fasteners, such as buttons (908 finds), aglets (1,188 finds), belts (267 finds) and buckles (771 finds). 

Among the medical items (1,292 finds), ointment jars were well represented (919 fragments).

The vast collection of artefacts are well illustrated on the web site for the project entitled Below the Surface and with an exhibition at one of the Metro Stations along the line. 

Social Engineering in a Soft Centre

The Stanford marshmallow experiment was a series of studies on delayed gratification in the late 1960s and early 1970s led by psychologist Walter Mischel, then a professor at Stanford University. In these studies, a child was offered a choice between one small reward provided immediately or two small rewards if they waited for a short period, approximately 15 minutes, during which the tester left the room and then returned. (The reward was sometimes a marshmallow, but often a cookie or a pretzel.) In follow-up studies, the researchers found that children who were able to wait longer for the preferred rewards tended to have better life outcomes, as measured by SAT scores, educational attainment, body mass index (BMI), and other life measures.

The experiment has its roots in an earlier one performed in Trinidad, where Mischel noticed that the different ethnic groups living on the island had contrasting stereotypes about one another, in terms of the other's perceived recklessness, self-control, and ability to have fun. This study focused on male and female children aged seven to nine (35 Black and 18 East Indian) in a rural Trinidad school. 

The children were required to indicate a choice between receiving a 1¢ candy immediately, or having a 10¢ candy given to them in one week's time. Mischel reported a significant ethnic difference, with Indian children showing far more ability to delay gratification as compared to African students, as well as large age differences, and that "Comparison of the 'high' versus 'low' socioeconomic groups on the experimental choice did not yield a significant difference"  Absence of the father was prevalent in the African-descent group but occurred only once in the East Indian group, and this variable showed the strongest link to delay of gratification, with children from intact families showing superior ability to delay. The first "Marshmallow Test" was a study conducted by Walter Mischel and Ebbe B. Ebbesen at Stanford University in 1960.

The purpose of the original study was to understand when the control of delayed gratification, the ability to wait to obtain something that one wants, develops in children. The original experiment took place at the Bing Nursery School located at Stanford University, using children of ages four to six as subjects. The children were led into a room, empty of distractions, where a treat of their choice (Oreo cookie, marshmallow, or pretzel stick) was placed on a table.  

Children could eat the treat, the researchers said, but if they waited for fifteen minutes without giving in to the temptation, they would be rewarded with a second treat. Mischel observed that some would "cover their eyes with their hands or turn around so that they can't see the tray, others start kicking the desk, or tug on their pigtails, or stroke the marshmallow as if it were a tiny stuffed animal," while others would simply eat the marshmallow as soon as the researchers left.

In over 600 children who took part in the experiment, a minority ate the marshmallow immediately. Of those who attempted to delay, one third deferred gratification long enough to get the second marshmallow. Age was a major determinant of deferred gratification.

On the table in the experimental room there were five pretzels and an opaque cake tin. Under the cake tin were five pretzels and two animal cookies. There were two chairs in front of the table; on one chair was an empty cardboard box. On the floor near the chair with the cardboard box on it were four battery operated toys. 

The experimenter pointed out the four toys; before the child could play with the toys, the experimenter asked the child to sit in the chair and then demonstrated each toy briefly and in a friendly manner, saying that they would play with the toys later on. Then the experimenter placed each toy in the cardboard box and out of sight of the child. 

The experimenter explained to the child that the experimenter sometimes has to go out of the room but if the child eats a pretzel the experimenter will come back into the room. These instructions were repeated until the child seemed to understand them completely. The experimenter left the room and waited for the child to eat a pretzel – they did this four times.

Next the experimenter opened the cake tin to reveal two sets of reward objects to the child: five pretzels and two animal crackers. The experimenter asked which of the two the child liked better, and after the child chose, the experimenter explained that the child could either continue waiting for the more preferred reward until the experimenter returned, or the child could stop waiting by bringing the experimenter back. If the child stopped waiting, then the child would receive the less favoured reward and forgo the more preferred one.

Depending on the condition and the child’s choice of preferred reward, the experimenter picked up the cake tin and along with it either nothing, one of the rewards, or both. The experimenter returned either as soon as the child signalled him to do so or after 15 minutes.

In follow-up studies, Mischel found unexpected correlations between the results of the marshmallow test and the success of the children many years later. 

The first follow-up study, in 1988, showed that "preschool children who delayed gratification longer in the self-imposed delay paradigm, were described more than 10 years later by their parents as adolescents who were significantly more competent.

A second follow-up study, in 1990, showed that the ability to delay gratification also correlated with higher educational  scores.

(Yes, not in any way my own work but an interesting case study inspired by a radio broadcast on BBC 4 Extra during last week)

Earnest Endeavours in Computer Science

In my childhood years, those being in the late 1960's and early to mid 1970's the name Ernie was, to me ,associated with three different things.

The first was the character created by the comedian Benny Hill and the subject of his popular chart topping song, "The fastest milkman in the west" which enthralled us all with the epic tale of milk wars and unrequited love on the doorstep amongst the full fat pintas.

The second Ernie was the small, cheek chappy who acted as the straight  man for Eric Morecambe in the regular saturday night TV schedule. Even as impressionable youngsters we did not think that anything was at all strange about two grown up, unrelated men sitting in a double bed in their pyjamas.

Both these Ernies entertained and amused us but in the trilogy of the same name only E.R.N.I.E could really change your life and destiny.

Comic talent and genuis aside for the former Ernies the latter was far more significant in the life and aspirations of the British public.

In that era if you wanted to have an opportunity to win a lot of money then the options were quite sparse. The football pools relied upon skill, judgement and outright luck to get the right predictions of score draws to be in for a chance of the prize fund. You could always resort to a bank or payroll heist but most public spirited citizens went in for the purchase of Premium Bonds.

You could say that they were a crude forerunner of the National Lottery and that could be true excepting that the Government backed bonds from National Savings and Investments which put you in a regular prize draw could also be cashed in and as when the need arose.

E.R.N.I.E was the slang and populist name for the computer, or Electronic Random Number Indicator Equipment which was fired up to generate 2000 premium bond numbers every hour.

If you could be bothered to scour through the huge list of Premium Bond numbers that E.R.N.I.E spewed out with such automatic efficiency you could claim a rightful cash prize.

If it helped the British economy along the way then  it was not in any way gambling, rather a conscientious investment in the country.

Our Grandparents and Parents presented us with Premium Bonds on our birthdays and other auspicious anniversaries and we were thrilled to receive them although to tell the truth we did not really understand what they were all about.

I remember wanting to enter the Match of the Day Goal of the Month Competitions on the occasions that I was allowed to stay up that late not for the kudos of picking the same players as the independent panel but for the chance of winning the fantastical sum of £100 in Premium Bonds.

E.R.N.I.E was a mystical entity and I would often scribble down a characterisation of what I thought he/it looked like in reality.

There was, in my crude drawings a bit of a theme going on of a robot with a smiley face pattern composed of control dials and with a ticker-tape dispenser for his mouth from whence the lucky numbers would be produced.

Upon learning, much later on in my life that E.R.N.I.E was in fact a mass of whirring dials and about the size of a mobile van I was genuinely deflated and disappointed.

Turns out that the origins of the Electronic Random Number Indicator Equipment were in the Colussus machines developed by the Code Breaker Operation at Bletchley Park and with the same influential team of boffins and clever- clogs working on it, many who remained anonymous and largely unappreciated in their time and for their exhausting contributions to computer science and defeating fascism.

The rapid progress in technology had made the first E.R.N.I.E obsolete by around 1972 and in 1988 the same random number generator was the size of a personal computer and not a large panel vehicle on wheels.

By 2004 the version known as E.R.N.I.E  4 was about five hundred times faster than its predecessors and with around one million prize numbers produced every hour.

What with the get rich quick expectations from the National Lottery draws, Scratchcards, impromptu giveaways by the likes of daytime television and the X-Factor the value of money has been cheapened more than ever before.

I personally would not bother to enter any competition draw where the top prize was less than, say, a million pounds.

Against this level of assumed entitlement the Premium Bond is but a paltry offering but to me it still has an allure, a fascination and mystery.

I wonder what E.R.N.I.E is doing right now, this very minute?

Out of Mothballs

Thankfully I am of that generation who are not able to recognise the odour of mothballs.

In fact I am not entirely sure what they are and had to do a bit of research into them.

Mothballs are a combination of pesticide and deodorant that deter the activities of moths and the development of mould amongst, mainly, items of stored cloth such as clothes, bedding and the like.

They are still sold in DIY outlets under various brand names and styles which I found surprising as infestations of that type are surely confined to distant memory.....or are they?

Turns out that as a freakish side-effect of the recent dry, hot spell and the underlying and fundamental changes in climate in the UK some regions are in the grip of a massive attack by clothes moths.

This was brought to my attention just today during a visit to a house in York, North Yorkshire.

You may recall my recent writings on the destruction of lawns in the York area by birds in their frenzied feeding on grubs which had suddenly surged in numbers and coverage in the subsoils of many suburban gardens. It may be a coincidence but householders across the very same City have been suffering from the effects of an invasion of another pest, in the form of clothes moths in recent weeks.

There appears to be no escape either out of doors or indoors for York residents from an almost plaque like pestilence of creatures intent on wreaking havoc.

The house in question was like a scene from a horror movie, a voodoo emporium with every room having a modern version of the mothball hanging on the back of a door or the front of a cupboard.

The problem had surfaced with the mysterious goings on with the living room carpet which had started to shows signs of shrinkage in size. Originally well fitted on grippers and presenting a sharp edge to the skirtings the occupants noticed a gap appearing which could not be attributed to such things as natural shrinkage, dampness, earthquake or other phenomena.

After a period of casual monitoring it was clear that the carpet, a nice wool one, was being devoured by the larvae of the species Tineola bisselliella or clothes moth.

There had been considerable distraction caused by the matter of the carpet but with the identification of the culprit it soon became all too clear that clothing was also a primary food source for the creature.

It was understandable that the problem had suddenly emerged as the larvae are very tiny, less than maggot sized and hard to detect. If there had been an influx of the mature winged moths then this would have started the alarm bells ringing but as they say. when the moths arrive the damage has already been done.

The larvae are a prime example of evolutionary genius.

They have the metabolism to digest the keratin protein in wool and silk primarily but have also been known to diet on cotton and fur. In addition they favour dirty environments with a particular liking for natural fibres infused with human sweat and what can be tactfully described as organic liquids although that covers just about everything from foodstuffs to you know what.

For those of you glancing anxiously around their own soft furnishings and fashion items the breeding grounds for the larvae are under furniture and in piles of clothing that are waiting to be ironed or put away.

Just grab the hoover and explore those dark areas, gaps and natural crevices around the home and have a policy of re-washing any clothes that have been lying around.

Treatment kits are a bit of a current boom business for Pest Control operatives but as important in the fight against the carpet and fibre munchers is a good domestic cleaning routine.

As well as the climatic conditions favouring the upsurge in larvae and moths the increase in infestations has also been attributed to the addiction of consumers to Designer clothing which uses the very natural fibres that sustain the voracious appetite of the larvae in their preparation for transformation into the mature moth.

The traditional mothball and their archived, distinctive odour may be making a comeback.

Florence Nightingale's Stubble

I grew one, briefly, during my enforced convalescence from an injury - a beard.

It was one of those things, a combination of not physically being able to stand in front of the mirror and shave and an attempt to boost my self esteem, mightily deflated from my loss or mobility.

I was, after all, just following the prevailing trend of beard growing which has reached all walks of life from media and sporting figures to the ordinary man in the street. They are everywhere to be seen and goodness, there are some right bushy and splendidly full growths that must have taken some time and effort to perfect and the usual jibes about just being lazy are as far from reality as you can get.

So what explains this trend?

Well, it is actually a deep rooted male response to the actual and perceived threats to manhood in general.

It is not a new phenomena and indeed the origins of the beard as a statement of virility, authority and heroism can be traced back to the Victorian era, in particular the early 1850's when pressures of a similar social, cultural, economic and political were being exerted on the male population as they are today.

It did not start as a fashion although did develop into this as the trend picked up.

The instigators of beard wearing were British soldiers returning from the harsh conditions of the Crimean War. The senior ranks had given concessions to the troops to grow facial hair as a counter to deprivations on the front line in that far off, inhospitable place and upon their return to the UK the sight of disembarking soldiers sparked the imagination of the nation and popular culture.

Queen Victoria herself attended Portside to welcome her armed forces back from the Crimea and in her personal writings was almost lustful and giddy over what she described as the fine, tall and handsome men sporting huge beards who marched past for her to review.

Prior to the return of the bearded heroes the attitude towards facial growth could not have been more different.

A brief flirtation with sideburns and whiskers in the 18th century had soon fizzled out and those persisting in displaying them often found themselves being insulted and abused  by random members of the public and accused of being  a "filthy Frenchie".

Clean shaven male faces were soon back as the norm being regarded with as much reverence as the desire for pale skin in English ladies who had to shun the sun and healthy open spaces to maintain a pallid and listless demeanour which polite society demanded of them.

Soon popular and classic literary heroes were seen to have beards and were championed by the great writers of the era including Charles Dickens.

Our beardy heroes today are more likely to come from movies and rock bands than the pages of novels.

Of all the fashion trends the decision to grow a beard is an easy and cheap one.

You just have to stop shaving, endure the early growth stage when everything looks a bit pubic and scruffy, persuade loved ones that it suits you ,survive the jibes and banter at work for a few weeks and then carefully groom and tend to the beard until, suddenly, it is a revelation and you do not know why you did not grow one before.

I found my beard quite liberating after 40 years of a daily clean shave.

Imagine, I have dedicated around 5 minutes a day, every day (some weekends excepted) to shaving during those forty years. Had I been bearded for all that time I will have had 1216 days equivalent free time to do other things apart from shaving.

So what is the future of the beard  towards the end of the second decade of the twentieth century?

In a Guardian Newspaper Article it was muted that 2016 had been the point of "peak" beard but in my own experience the practice is as strong as ever.

It may convey a strong character in the presence of others or elicit admiring glances from the population who favour such things but at the same time it is a disguise, a cloak of concealment from the rigours of life and a desperate attempt to latch onto manhood and manly things.

I did enjoy my stint in a beard although there were some streaks of ginger amongst the grey hair as a throwback to my Scottish ancestry which just looked weird, like I had dribbled a Werther's Original.

It was a good feeling, equally, to return to a fresh, smooth face which. after all, places me within a minority amongst my gender.

Gas; Better out in the open

On some days they blotted out the horizon and yet on others they had vanished and all that could be seen was the uninterrupted sky.

They were the mysterious Gasometers, once a familiar feature in our urban landscape.It was the clever adaptability of the round storage tanks that allowed them to rise and fall with a concertina action. When in full gas storage use they had the appearance of a massive layered wedding cake and yet in periods of low demand for the fuel there was often nothing to see apart from something that resembled a small baking tin.

Gasometers, a British invention, first appeared 180 years ago and quickly caught on as an effective means of storing large amounts of gas at low pressure.

In the pre-War and pre-nationalisation era, gasometers were everywhere with over 1,000 gas companies in operation. Just about every town had its own gas works and the gasometer was the central focus. They were cast iron at the start but steel sections came later, in the 1880s.

The technology was basic but effective with the rim of each chamber sealed by water and with no room for air inside, the holder prevents the otherwise volatile early town gas from igniting.

Natural gas, locked deep into subterranean pockets of continental land masses and the oceans was still very much a thing of the future, and instead households and industry relied on town gas, which resulted from carbonising coal. It was a dirty and polluting process but nevertheless played an important role in keeping active the many belching factories of the old style mass manufacturing industry. Production of town gas was a major contributing factor to the stifling and lethal pea souper fogs and smogs that were a common problem in UK cities and towns well into the 20th Century.

While gasholders were never conventionally beautiful they exhibited a fair degree of decoration.In St Pancras and Bromley-by-Bow in London the design was in a Grecian-type finish as an example of architectural influences on purely functional installations but the style was not adopted and carried through in other locations  because it required a lot of maintenance.

More recent attempts have been made to soften their presence.Gasometers in Harrow, Middlesex, and Bromley, Kent, were painted in an effort to blend in with the local surroundings. A holder in Harrogate was painted with fuchsias for a Britain in Bloom contest and wishes have been granted on the odd occasion to hang "happy birthday" banners on the steel lattice framework or the fully expanded cylinders.

Most gasometers were to be found in industrial settings or on the edge of the built up extent of our towns and cities but could still dominate a landscape or rooftop view.

A few in very prominent locations did attain a popular and cult status, the most famous being the giant storage tank that was adjacent to the Oval cricket pitch in south London and could be seen on TV coverage of club and test matches to become an international sporting landmark.

Transco, the pipeline arm of the former British Gas monolith intends to dismantle virtually all its 550 gasometers across the country. Only a handful will remain and then only because they are Listed Buildings.

Advances in pipeline technology and the ability to predict levels of  demand mean there is no longer any need for the stockpiling of supplies of gas in these massive storage cylinders.

Some of the sites which stood under and around the gasometers have cost millions to remediate from contamination so that the land can come back into some form of economic use. The ground on sites where town gas was previously manufactured can be heavily contaminated with a substance commonly known as 'Blue Billy' consisting of spent lime that becomes fouled with sulphur and sometimes cyanogens giving its distinctive blue colour.

Some of the more architecturally pleasing gasometers have been converted into residential and commercial use, perhaps one of the best examples being in Vienna, Austria.

The removal of the Gasometers from our urban environments has generally been carried out with little or no public protest or even interest. One gas utility company did commission a community artist to provide a lasting record of a few of the holders, including St Mark Street in my home town of Hull.

Most of us who grew up to the backdrop of these drab canister structures will have associated them with an old world image and equally drab and dreary economic times.

And remember, even gas holders get depressed sometimes....................................................