The Massive Fergie Factor

He's not dead or should I pronounce it as deed.

You would think that with all the media attention he had died.

The sheer volume of comment in the media, anecdotes from those of celebrity status, former colleague and friends, a few sworn enemies, the Prime Minister for goodness sake and even someone who once stood behind him in the queue at Greggs is only really experienced in such a scale upon the loss of a national treasure.

Then again, it is not everyday that Sir Alex Ferguson announces his retirement, or did I mistakenly recall that he has done that at least a couple of times in the last decade.

I do respect the man for his achievements and in particular his survival in what is a fickle, back stabbing and downright nasty environment that is top flight football.

He can be a bit grumpy, that goes without saying. He can be outspoken and if Match of the Day and ITV Sport had opted for sub titles in his pre, half time and post match interviews I am sure that they will have been modern classics of insightfulness, humour, wit and great analytical aptitude.

At more than one period in his management he refused to come before a camera following something that the media did to upset and annoy him and would send one of his lieutenants along to give a reaction to the game.

A main theme in the tributes to Sir Alex, who has not by the way died, was one of how much of a pivotal role he had played in the lives of ordinary people. The phone-in callers to 5 Live were to a man ( yes, no women rang in) almost in tears at the news of the end of an era.

You would think that ,from the hysteria and girly weeping so shamefully outpoured, his retirement fulfilled one of the predictions of Nostradamus and that the world would soon come to an end.

The Fan Forum from Manchester, broadcast on the very evening of the announcement was similarly an expression of apocalyptic doom and gloom. Get a grip you people!

I lay the blame for this reaction squarely on the shoulders of the 25 to 40 year age group.

They are an impressionable bunch, brought up in an era of limited role models and with everything coming so easy for them. In the absence of a life threatening risk from the likes of rickets, mumps, german measles, hooping cough, Thatcher policies and  nuclear war they are a generation of softies who have tended to latch onto persons in the media, music, film and sport and have elevated them to cult and iconic status.

Now with the onset of Twitter, Facebook and a raft of social media capabilities they think that they are unstoppable.

Those of my era are in fear of their jobs and social standing as the newbies, celebrity savvy and in pursuit of their few minutes of fame or notoriety, bullshit their way into positions of influence and importance.

We, the baby boomers, are firmly stuck in the middle of the social sandwich.

Above us are the oldies who once placed great emphasis on educational qualifications and proper manners, clean shoes and the correct colour of tie with a collared shirt but who are now running scared, isolated and seeking approval of the new kids on the block. The bullshit has certainly baffled those brains.

This current stage in the experiment that is modern Britain is no more evident than in the latest series of The Apprentice on the BBC.

The candidates are from the new strain, over-excitable and a little bit manic, throwing the words 'passionate' and 'motivated' around as though they knew what they meant and extremely full of their own sense of worth.

I find this worrying in the extreme.

Just behind an unnervingly full and lush head of hair, a fake tan, neatly trimmed or shabby chic facial bumpf and an expensively shiny suit there appears to be absolutely no substance whatsoever. The male contingent of this years intake are the same.

They speak a different language to my age group. By no means am I a luddite or dinosaur. I constantly amaze my offspring, all young adults, under 25 by the way, with my knowledge of chart music, the current married or otherwise status of celebrity figures and with snatches of occasional street language that leaves them astounded, or does being astounded have the same facial expression as shocked and embarrassed?

The job lot of those on The Apprentice have no pedigree, backbone or experience of life and yet they parade about and play at being grown ups, shamefully encouraged by Sir Alan (also not yet dead) for the sake of entertainment.

It is however very compulsive viewing but I am always left with an innate sense of anxiety that one day this generation will actually play an important role that could directly affect me in one way or another.

Anyway, back to the pouring out of emotions at the loss of Sir Alex.(not technically dead).

He has certainly gone out on a high. The Premier League Title was won at a canter. The team failed in its other campaigns and any manager of less standing would now be helping out at his nearest Citizens Advice Bureau, for sure.

His replacement was swift and decisive, in fact within 24 hours. The 2012 to 2013 season is coming to a close and the long summer break will have been an ideal time for the media to speculate and fill up the sparse sports pages linking all and sundry to the post. The press must feel cheated at this deprivation of column upon column inches but the trademark and mantra of Manchester United under Sir Alex has been stability and continuity. Rather, I suggest it is down to the nervy fluctuation in their share price that demanded that no time was wasted in appointing a successor.

Football is big business and United are the global masters in that sector. Protection of profit and market share are as important as having a strong midfield and defence in the actual playing of the game.

What future for Sir Alex? (Reminder; Not dead). He has plenty of interests in the real world from his racehorses to his red wine. Does he have a book out yet? I have Sean Bean down to portray him in the inevitable movie depiction of his illustrious career. His impending hip operation was front page news and I look forward to regular pictorial updates on that. He may pop up as a guest summariser on big match broadcasts, subject to the option of sub titles being available to those on terrestrial and red button services, or on quiz and celebrity participation shows. His face will no doubt be seen amongst other notables at those 'Audiences With.......' type programmes that pad out the schedules.

I expect that the manufacturers of chewing gum are beating a path to his door to sign him up for an advertising campaign as they certainly have a lot to lose with his departure from regularly being seen  in public life.

He could surprise us all.

B&Q are crying out for seniors with people skills and experience. After all he should know a fair bit about what constitutes a good grass surface and what does not. "Sir Alex to Customer Services, Sir Alex to Customer Services, Customer waiting" that gives me a nice, warm and very comforting feeling inside.