Donecasting

Public Votes; just asking for trouble. 

I mean the process whereby Companies and Organisations have a bright idea to consult the general population in an attempt to create an online frenzy and capture a lot of data that could be put to good use in marketing campaigns. 

This could be something quite simple and innocuous. 

In my home city, Hull in Yorkshire, the Council invited suggestions for the name of a female Iguana lizard that had arrived to be a sort of companion for their resident reptile, the famous head nodding but melancholy, George. 

It was a well calculated campaign as there could of course be only one final outcome. Based on the profile of an old couple, a bit mismatched, one a bit sedentary and the other prone to bossiness then the public at large could only ever go for Mildred- as in the famous TV sitcom couple of the 1970’s. 

No real opportunities for a PR horror show there then. Mildred and George, George and Mildred.

The same could not be said for quite a few other campaigns. 

In 2010 a competition was held to suggest and vote on a new concert destination for the megastar Justin Bieber. The overwhelming winner was of course, North Korea but the Bieber Corporation refused to acknowledge the validity of the vote. 

Taylor Swift, another of the internet generation, looked for nominations of U.S schools in which she could perform. A well managed act of on line sabotage saw The Horace Mann School for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing easily top the poll. In a clever side step, the management of the mega-artiste gave a sizeable donation as a sweetener for blocking any further voting for the school. 

Pop Culture is a big market sector for any product or celebrity campaign and so when the Walmart chain put up a prize of a concert by the rapper Pitbull in any city with one of its stores it was too much of a temptation for those intent on mischief and mayhem. Momentum in the vote saw the remotest store, in Kodiak, Alaska come out on top. 

To his credit, Pitbull honoured the outcome and probably froze his pitbulls off in the process. 

The Kraft food empire PR and Marketing Team must have felt confident in their bid to get ideas from the general public for a new product launch, that being a blend of Vegemite and Cream Cheese. Vegemite has cultural and social history particularly in Australia and any tampering with the classic taste could be seen as an attack on lifestyle and history. The winning suggestion was a rather boring “iSnack2.0” but this was soon pulled by Kraft in favour of Vegemite Cheesybite. 

I cannot recall having seen that product anywhere on my local supermarket shelves. 

Mountain Dew, a soft drinks manufacturer also placed a lot of faith in what it thought was a loyal customer base in asking for names for its apple-green drink. Many responses were offensive and I can not repeat them for fear of causing upset although to give you an idea they included “Diabeetus” and “Hitler did nothing wrong”. 

The power of veto came into play and thank goodness for that decision by Mountain Dew. 

A well orchestrated campaign by fans or spoilers can wreak havoc and there is just no way that the result can be upheld by sensible and respectable organisations.

The recent behaviour by The National Environmental Research Council in not adopting the resoundingly popular Boaty McBoatface for one of its survey ships was a PR disaster. 

Greenpeace in contrast were more than pleased to name a whale in their anti-hunting monitoring programme in the South Pacific after the vote winner- Mr Splashy Pants inspite of the smart money being on the punning Humphrey. 

Public Bodies do run a real risk of being branded hypocrites or being undemocratic in setting off on the voting path. In Austin, Texas the renaming of the refuse dump for the city was put out for a vote. In second place came “Department of Neat and Clean” and top of the pile but not rubbish some 26,000 votes ahead was “The Fred Durst Society of the Humanities and Arts” being an homage to the Limp Bizkit musician although he may not have had anything to do with Texas at all. 

The Authorities did not accept the result and went for Austin Resource Recovery instead. 

Under such a weight of evidence that public votes can be problematic I have every admiration for Doncaster Council in South Yorkshire, UK. 

Obviously a progressive administrative body or at least with employees who have a grasp of the finer side of social media they started an on line competition for names for two new road gritting lorries, you know the sort that you only see after dark on British Roads and who, at the slightest hint of a cold temperature throw out a dusting of salt or grit to try to prevent the formation of black ice. 

The Council already operate liveried gritting vehicles emblazoned across the drivers cab with Brad Grit, Gritney Spears, The Sub zero hero and the Simpsons inspired Mr Plow. 

Best suggestions would be put into a World Cup style knockout, in fact a bit like a Proportional Representation voting system with paired names being voted on and the successful one progressing to the next stage culminating, in the Doncaster experiment, in two winning finalists. 

A key factor in capturing the imagination of the population of not only the townsfolk but the wider internet world was a firm pledge that the winners would be unconditionally adopted. 

At least a lesson had been learnt there from the disastrous snubbing of Boaty McBoatface .

Entries suggested by the public included Salt Disney, Lionel Gritchie, Sir Gritsalot, Gritney Houston, Grittilla the Hun, Freddie Salted, True Grit, Rule Grittania, Fern Gritton, Walter the Salter, The Gravellator, Grit Van Dyke and Spready Mercurie. 

That South Yorkshire lot have a great sense of humour. 

The two successful names were worthy winners. 

David Plowie and ,I am not sure how wide the gritter will have to be to accommodate the other, Gritsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Anti-Slip Machiney.

I feel like putting a warm coat in the car, topping up the anti freeze and screen wash, replenishing my trusted supply of Kendal mint cake, stowing a shovel in the boot and, at the first sign of even a little freeze, making the 40 or so mile drive to Doncaster to see these wonderful gritters in action.