I have written blogs on survival techniques for the natural occurrence
of an avalanche goo.gl/RybGWA and more recently on the subject of what to do if confronted by
a polar bear. goo.gl/EEwwGe
Today’s bit of advice relates to a specific situation that you
might find yourself in- that being forced to take refuge in an excavated
chamber underground whilst being stalked and then imprisoned in said hole by an
agent of a foreign and less than friendly power.
I am of course referring to the fictional storyline of the anonymous "Rogue Male", although everyone knows him as Sir Robert, the creation in 1939 of the book of the same name by the thriller writer Geoffrey Household (yes, that is his real name- Geoffrey).
After being captured with his finger on the trigger of a high powered rifle near the residence of a European leader, tortured, left to die but then escaping to relative freedom in England our hero has taken refuge in a burrow intentionally in order to throw off his scent not only the fanatical agents but also the home grown local constabulary.
The cramped place has been meticulously excavated in a sandstone bank with concealed entrance behind bramble bushes and a chimney stack for ventilation and occasional cook-ups of a well stocked subterranean larder.
He is prepared to stay down there for months if necessary before making a run to the south coast sea ports to make a life, reluctantly for one so patriotic, in a safe haven on distant shores.
Unfortunately his adversary and nemesis is a prolific psychologist and tracker and eventually entombs Sir Robert in order to force him to sign a confession that will implicate the British Government in a plot to kill the Dictator.
He has nothing to lose as he knows that as soon as he emerges with the signed document he will be made to disappear.
It is a battle of survival with only one winner.
Our man is inspired to construct a hand drawn Ballista, an ancient artillery piece put to devastating effect in full scale form by the Romans. He has no other effective weapons at his disposal to extricate himself from his dire situation.
The snag lies in the fact that he has very little by way of materials to work with apart from what is lying around in his fast deteriorating surroundings as ground water and limited air supply affect his very existence.
This is his design but with the exception of one special component anyone stuck in a hole could try to build this weapon. My measurements are in the old imperial units. I apologise for my crude working drawings but there is not much space or natural light for me to work- yes, I am going for authenticity here although I admit I am in the understairs cupboard rather than actually buried.
A) Take a flat plank or board, about 3 feet long.
B) In the centre cut out a semi circular aperture big enough for your projectile, in this case a meat skewer, although a straightened out metal tent peg would be suitable.
C) Take two reasonable sound and regular house bricks of matching size, the old nine inchers are great. Top and bottom of each brick should be abraded into a shallow channel or groove across the narrower width
D) Lay the bricks equidistant on the plank so that the aperture is dead centre
E) Across the top and bottom of the bricks and fitted into the pre-cut grooves are ash branches, so that they protrude beyond the bricks like the ends of a conventional archery bow
F) Strongly tie or lash the bricks, ash branches and plank together using the hide of a freshly skinned cat (it is imperative that the cat has died within a few minutes from natural courses or cold blooded murder by the hired assassin of a foreign power). Actual demise is optional.
G) Using the highly elasticated gut of the same donor cat carefully attach to the protruding ash ends and twist the strands for maximum strength.
H) Bring the two ends of the strengthened cat gut together and fasten with a small leather thong (this could be a small bit cut from a hideskin coat or jacket).
I) Run the sharp end of the skewer through the aperture and nestle the blunter end in the thong
J) Sit down on the saturated soil in the base of the hole, place your feet on either side of the plank and then carefully lie back and by doing so tension the cat gut to its maximum.
K) Somehow persuade or trick the foreign agent into sticking his full face in at the entrance to the burrow. A bit of typical English defiance, fake tears or biting sarcasm usually works a treat to get a response
L) Let fly with the heavy weapon so that the terminal velocity over a distance of about three feet from skewer tip to victims forehead is sufficient to cause instantaneous death.
It really is as simple as that and you are then free to make your way to civilisation for a bath, shave and fresh clothes.
If you are a bit squeamish or over sensitive about the cat contribution to the contraption then extracting elastic from your underwear and using strips of strong cloth would enable you to carry out steps F) through G).
Next time I will cover the subject of escaping from a stricken submarine.
I am of course referring to the fictional storyline of the anonymous "Rogue Male", although everyone knows him as Sir Robert, the creation in 1939 of the book of the same name by the thriller writer Geoffrey Household (yes, that is his real name- Geoffrey).
After being captured with his finger on the trigger of a high powered rifle near the residence of a European leader, tortured, left to die but then escaping to relative freedom in England our hero has taken refuge in a burrow intentionally in order to throw off his scent not only the fanatical agents but also the home grown local constabulary.
The cramped place has been meticulously excavated in a sandstone bank with concealed entrance behind bramble bushes and a chimney stack for ventilation and occasional cook-ups of a well stocked subterranean larder.
He is prepared to stay down there for months if necessary before making a run to the south coast sea ports to make a life, reluctantly for one so patriotic, in a safe haven on distant shores.
Unfortunately his adversary and nemesis is a prolific psychologist and tracker and eventually entombs Sir Robert in order to force him to sign a confession that will implicate the British Government in a plot to kill the Dictator.
He has nothing to lose as he knows that as soon as he emerges with the signed document he will be made to disappear.
It is a battle of survival with only one winner.
Our man is inspired to construct a hand drawn Ballista, an ancient artillery piece put to devastating effect in full scale form by the Romans. He has no other effective weapons at his disposal to extricate himself from his dire situation.
The snag lies in the fact that he has very little by way of materials to work with apart from what is lying around in his fast deteriorating surroundings as ground water and limited air supply affect his very existence.
This is his design but with the exception of one special component anyone stuck in a hole could try to build this weapon. My measurements are in the old imperial units. I apologise for my crude working drawings but there is not much space or natural light for me to work- yes, I am going for authenticity here although I admit I am in the understairs cupboard rather than actually buried.
A) Take a flat plank or board, about 3 feet long.
B) In the centre cut out a semi circular aperture big enough for your projectile, in this case a meat skewer, although a straightened out metal tent peg would be suitable.
C) Take two reasonable sound and regular house bricks of matching size, the old nine inchers are great. Top and bottom of each brick should be abraded into a shallow channel or groove across the narrower width
D) Lay the bricks equidistant on the plank so that the aperture is dead centre
E) Across the top and bottom of the bricks and fitted into the pre-cut grooves are ash branches, so that they protrude beyond the bricks like the ends of a conventional archery bow
F) Strongly tie or lash the bricks, ash branches and plank together using the hide of a freshly skinned cat (it is imperative that the cat has died within a few minutes from natural courses or cold blooded murder by the hired assassin of a foreign power). Actual demise is optional.
G) Using the highly elasticated gut of the same donor cat carefully attach to the protruding ash ends and twist the strands for maximum strength.
H) Bring the two ends of the strengthened cat gut together and fasten with a small leather thong (this could be a small bit cut from a hideskin coat or jacket).
I) Run the sharp end of the skewer through the aperture and nestle the blunter end in the thong
J) Sit down on the saturated soil in the base of the hole, place your feet on either side of the plank and then carefully lie back and by doing so tension the cat gut to its maximum.
K) Somehow persuade or trick the foreign agent into sticking his full face in at the entrance to the burrow. A bit of typical English defiance, fake tears or biting sarcasm usually works a treat to get a response
L) Let fly with the heavy weapon so that the terminal velocity over a distance of about three feet from skewer tip to victims forehead is sufficient to cause instantaneous death.
It really is as simple as that and you are then free to make your way to civilisation for a bath, shave and fresh clothes.
If you are a bit squeamish or over sensitive about the cat contribution to the contraption then extracting elastic from your underwear and using strips of strong cloth would enable you to carry out steps F) through G).
Next time I will cover the subject of escaping from a stricken submarine.
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