English Lesson 7

So, already we are at the letter "G" in the compilation of definitions of English Words from the BBC Radio Series "I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue" which has been producing such nonsense since 1972. The definitive list has been the labour of love of Kevin Hale, a Superfan of the show and I have dipped in and out of it shamefully exploiting his hard work.

The words and definitions are confusing enough but I apologise, again, to any Students of the English Language amongst my readers for adding mayhem and misdirection to their struggle.

There is, understandably, some political incorrectness present but please remember that the words and meanings do date back some considerable years to an era when people just spoke their mind with no sympathy or empathy for the offence that may have been caused at the time and subsequently.

I like to think that we are better for the experience of such things and much more in tune with others.

Here goes;

Gravy- close to death

Gurgle- the theft of a Ventriloquist Dummy

Guacamole- Mexican Visitor to Toad Hall *

Gross Behaviour- doing something 144 times *

Genealogy- allergic reaction to wearing denim

Game Warden- a traffic enforcement officer playing hide and seek

Granary- Old Folks Home

Geranium- the shout of a Gardener getting excited about starting the day

Geriatric- 3 goals by Gerd Muller *

Garden Gate- scandal involving Alan Titchmarsh

Grandee- the old lady between Gran C and Gran E

Gullible- stupid seabird

Gigolo- the sight of Jennifer Lopez running

Gripe- what Australian Wine is made from

Guy Fawkes Night- the period from September to December

Gentry- the way in to a Male Toilet

Gargoyle- Olive flavoured mouthwash

Gazette- baby antelope

Geiger Counter- device for measuring the performance of Ventriloquists

Gonorrhoea- getting behind with the rent

Gastronome- a flatulent Elf

Goatherd- exclamation on flushing the toilet

Groin- the Go signal on a traffic light in Birmingham

Goblet- small mouth

Giggle- a very small music event

Gastric- lighting a fart

Gondolier- something you can catch from a Boatman

Gringo- Mexican drummer in a Beatles Tribute Band

Gyroscope- equipment to locate a lost Benefit Cheque

Greenbelt- goes well with green trousers

Global- the sensation after sitting too close to an open fire

Glitch- irritation felt by a celebrity

Glockenspiel- a conversation about military sidearms

Grounds- angry dogs

Gibbet- a small piece of Great Britain

Geography- a chart depicting men called George

Geocentric- selfish men called George

Galaxy- a female with tendency to chop down trees

Gastroenteritis- the way into a fancy food pub

Gallbladder- what the French use to climb up things

Gazpacho- where Paul Gascoigne calls home

Gelatin- getting friendly with South Americans