Calling all Colleagues

I am a big fan of grumpy shopkeepers. In fact, the grumpier the better.

I am not one to demand or expect a stimulating conversation in return for bringing a bit of income and patronage to a business.

I have no preconceptions that ,upon opening a shop door to the resounding clang of a bell or an electronic beep, it will be a magical and life affirming experience and yet, it appears that many consumers do.

So much so that the internet is awash with the documented complaints of customers who feel that they have been harshly or rudely treated.

I emphasise that there are no allegations of unfair or unscrupulous behaviour on the part of proprietors, far from it. Reputations for running a good and well stocked shop remain gloriously unsullied. There are never any claims of profiteering, short measures, tampering or selling out of date or unsuitable merchandise. It all comes down to how welcoming, warm and ingratiating a shop keeper is to those who have shown favour to his offerings over the likes of Tesco, Sainsbury's, Asda, Waitrose and Morrisons.

Granted, in the dreamy, always sunny and halcyon days of yesteryear a local shop was everything to its local patrons.

Established residents in the older inner city housing areas recounted tales of how the corner shop, one of countless on just about every street corner in the country, provided a tab or credit facility to tide hard pressed families over until pay day as well as a whole range of functions that would now come under the normal workload of Social Services.

There was a certain image portrayed by such establishments.

Open all hours, boxes of fresh produce out on the pavement, an alluring window display with a seasonal theme,  loose weighed goods dispensed in brown paper twist top bags, all manner of goods from everyday items to those special purchases for a birthday or anniversary, small beer, bespoke orders taken, a Christmas Savings Club and no questions asked when little Johnny came to collect the Woodbines for his Dad before his expected return home from a long shift in some heavy and unhealthy industrial process.

The shop was a focal and meeting point to catch up on the gossip and to rally around those fallen upon hardship.

You can appreciate that today's shop keeper has a very hard act to follow.

Consider the view from the behind the cash register and Cadbury chocolate display.

There is little loyalty left as consumers are lured in and seduced by unbelievable three for two offers by the National Retailers, money off fuel, points and vouchers, cash back and even telephone and banking services. Stack them high and sell them cheap is a mantra that the true British shop keeper has never condoned and they have had to pay the ultimate price in being driven out of business in their many tens of thousands.

A rearguard action has been attempted by Independent Traders through adopting a Corporate identity which is plastered over the old traditional shop frontages,  mimicking the Multiples in own brand and budget lines and with some evident success in retaining a market share, albeit dwindling every time a Tesco Express or Sainsbury Local appears in the same postcode area.

So, those local shopkeepers who are still behind their counters, peeping out behind the Lottery machine ,scratch card and chewing gum dispensers are true survivors. They deserve respect and not a bit of a rant by a mystery shopper who feels violated and offended by the absence of a cheery welcome, exemplary assistance and a hearty but humble thanks for, lets face it, the handing over of mere pennies or at best a counterfeit twenty pound note.

So, the absence of any conversation, interaction or friendliness is perfectly fine in my frequent forays into village shops, neighbourhood sole proprietor general stores or those retail outlets at rural petrol stations.

If I want startlingly lively, witty and engaging banter I just need to get down to the nearest Tesco Hypermarket and seek out the appropriately badged and briefed Customer Jollity Colleague or whoever has drawn the short straw for that mindless and meaningless function.