Goggle Box

I still live in fear that one day, whilst casually watching some inane game show or property programme on my television, the images on the screen will flicker, fall in on themselves in a sort of vacuum induced movement, reduce to a whirling red dot and then re-focus with the ugly mug of Emperor Fu Manchu in full 1970's technicolour demanding we become his minions in his new World Order.

The original image from a feature film 40 years ago made quite an impression on me at the time.

It was, to my 10 year old brain, inconceivable that anyone or anything other than the BBC or ITV through the massive choice on the three channels could infiltrate and exert any influence, let alone use it as a platform to dominate the known world.

Of course, by the 1980's and later with the surge in technology it would be comparatively easy to take over the broadcast channels and exploit the TV in pride of place in UK homes in order to spread propaganda, subliminal messages, encourage rebellion or arouse disquiet and anxiety amongst the wider population.

Replace Emperor Fu Manchu with say, an intelligent alien race such as Kang and Kodos from the Simpsons and you can appreciate the potential for chaos and havoc.

The advertising industry has of course known about and manipulated the power of the small screen for a good few decades now.

In this country we have quite a sophisticated, high-brow and humorous approach to the marketing of goods and services hence the fact that the high points in any one hours transmission are the advert breaks.

Viewing figures, jealously sought and coveted by TV companies were, to my knowledge, part based upon the level of power surge demanded from the National Grid that commenced with an interval in between or after episodes of major drama productions or momentous programmes such as the Queen's Christmas Speech.

However, such is the interest in slick and witty or thought provoking adverts that we find ourselves passing over on the brief opportunity to dash into the kitchen to prepare a hot beverage.

I think the public fascination with the inherent drama of a TV advert started with those tantalising Gold Blend coffee shorts with the posh couple chatting each other up in clever wordplay and restrained etiquette. I expect that there is a degree course at a minor league University on the whole sexual politics theme centred on that long running series.

I may be doing a dis-service to the likes of Bisto who also had an extended run with their nuclear sized family and even the Milky Bar Kid or Flash cleaning fluid Grandma much further back in time.

There have also been some very long campaigns and in recent years the austerity faced by many large Corporate manufacturers has seen a revival of those old adverts but then again Retro stuff is very much back in fashion. Even the Tetley Tea Folk have been encouraged to return from exile to attempt to appeal to a new generation.

On this very day I am in a fevered state of anticipation over all things TV advertising.

The insidious marketing methods employed by Advertisers have worked their way into my psyche.

The Social media networks have been a-buzz with planted stories, hype and invention about what will emerge into our living rooms from our TV screens this evening.

The hysteria is similar to that produced by the Orson Welles drama of War of The Worlds in that people are not sure whether to believe or discount the rumours of what will intrude into our lives.

I am not sure what to expect but must admit that I did glimpse a photographic still of what looked like Baloo the Bear from Jungle Book.

Spoiler Alert, Spoiler Alert.

He is no Fu Manchu or alien insurrectionist in my book but I will still be glued to the box for the first screening of the John Lewis Christmas Campaign Ad sometime during that annoying and inconvenient interval thing called the X-Factor.