Peter Griffin, the head of the Griffin Family and the Family Guy is a bit of a hero.
Here are a few of his selected words of wisdom or at least the ones that can be published openly.
Lois, when I'm through with them, our kids will be so smart, they'll be able to program their own VCRs without spilling piping hot gravy all over myself.
Chris, everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.
Lois Griffin: Peter! You're bribing your daughter with a car?
Peter Griffin: Aw, c'mon Lois, isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?
Peter Griffin: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'
Brian Griffin: Peter, those are Cheerios.
Lois Griffin: Peter tell Chris that women are not objects!
Peter Griffin: Your mother's right Chris, listen to what it says.
Peter Griffin: I've had a good life. And you can always be proud of your father and all of his accomplishments.
Meg Griffin: What accomplishments?
Peter Griffin: Go to your room.
Peter: I'll handle it, Lois. I read a book about this sort of thing once.
Brian: Are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn't nothing?
Peter: Oh yeah.
Lois: You're drunk again.
Peter: No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking.
Peter- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Lois, this isn't my Batman glass.
Lois: I guarantee you a man made that commercial.
Peter: Of course a man made it. It's a commercial Lois, not a delicious thanksgiving dinner.
Peter: Lois, um, go get the medical dictionary and look up "fork" and "lung."
Lois: Why?
Peter: Time is a factor, Lois.
Peter: The deep south? Isn't that the place where the black guys are really lazy and all the white guys are just as lazy but they're mad at the black guys for being so lazy?
Peter: Sorry Meg. Daddy loves ya, but Daddy also loves Star Trek, and in all fairness, Star Trek was here first.
No comments:
Post a Comment