A warm feeling

The sound of the front door bell can mean many things to as many people.

It can announce the arrival of the Postman or delivery van bringing a large parcel on a birthday or special occasion or a surprise visit by relatives or friends keen to share good news or to celebrate something momentous.

These are just two examples of a happy and joyous moment.

In direct contrast the sound of a melodious ringtone could herald bad news such as in the serious face of a policeman or the apologetic but legally indignant attitude of a bailiff.

In my early years, when I was about 8, the silhouette of a shuffling, stooped shape through the frosted glass of the front door of our house and the soon to follow sounding of the bell chimes struck sheer and mortal terror into my very soul.

It was the dreaded weekly visit of the old lady delivering a local newspaper.

For some reason, whether bad timing or wholly intentional our house was the regular location when her bowels demanded attention.

My parents, kind, compassionate and Godly people, had made, in the opinion of us children a gross error of judgement in letting the lady use our downstairs toilet just the one time. It was a natural and humane thing to do, I appreciate that now at my world weary age of 51, but it was taken to be an acceptance that the cloakroom at 21 West Garth Gardens was now a public convenience or at least an exclusive facility for a specific employee of the free press.

Getting caught short is no laughing matter, something else I have learned from getting on in years.

Notwithstanding the potential embarrassment of being caught having a whiz in front of innocent passers by it is also an offence which could result in prosecution, a hefty fine and some very unwanted publicity and local notoriety.

There are limited options to have a legal wee but most of them involve spending not just the proverbial penny but having to fork out funds to buy something from a shop or hostelry in order to justify use of their facilities.

In remote locations there is wider scope to relieve yourself but conditional on the critical factors of checking wind direction, speed and the probability of being overlooked from a distance or in the freakish scenario of providing the roadside entertainment for a coach trip from the Women's Institute who just happen to be passing by and glancing up from their books and magazines.

The number of public lavatories is dwindling year on year being an easy target for Local Authority cutbacks. Those left are often unsanitary and frankly, pretty scary to enter and use with confidence.

It is just such a current situation that has prompted two citizens of New Orleans, USA to pioneer the phenomenon known as AirPnP.

There is already a thriving business in providing accommodation under the guise of Air BnB and so why not run out the model and ethos for subscribers to find a clean and comfortable bathroom on line or through a mobile phone App.

The marketing stance of AirPnp is;

"When there aren't enough bathrooms nearby for the amount of people in any given location Airpnp is there to save the day. 

Airpnp gives residences and businesses the opportunity to rent out their bathrooms to people in their immediate location who need to use it. 

This currently happens through a mobile optimized web app (native apps are in the works!). Users are able to rate their pee experience afterwards to others can see how each restroom stacks up.

The founders during the Mardi Gras in their home town of New Orleans routinely experienced the pain point of having no place to legally urinate. 

This problem is often solved by using what is known as a “rogue pee.” If caught the person faces a weekend in Orleans Parish Prison. Yet this stiff penalty doesn’t stop thousands upon thousands of “rogue pees.” This clearly demonstrates the demand for a legal alternative"

The scheme has proven popular with around 177 loo locations already available and with charges ranging from a few dollars to use the toilet in someone's home to a few hundred dollars for a truly luxurious and indulgent number one or number two in equally prestigious premises.

Unfortunately, in the UK the idea has been slow to take off with, to date, only two locations listed with one in Cornwall and the other within the premises of University College London.

The advertised cost is however quite an enticement at only £1 per sitting, or is that a standing charge?