Back to Back in Time

I struggled to find the right words. 

In the hierarchy of types of house and working technically downwards in general style there is detached, link detached (as in with a bridging garage or structure), semi-detached, terraced with sub categories of middle and end and the use of a trendy town house description. I have also seen a quarter detached where a detached building is divided into four residential parts over two floors. 

In recent years there has been a marketing of coach houses (a self contained unit over a garage block) as a variation on a traditional but bygone theme. 

I thought that I had seen everything in the house sector, faithfully recording on my inspection sheet these tried and publicly accepted types. 

Then my world was turned upside down or rather challenged vertically with a whole new format of property. 

On first impression the place was large and rather plain, three storeys in height and with lots and lots of windows on the front elevation and what I could see of the deep length of the side wall. It looked very long and narrow, in fact making an internal floorplan quite unworkable in that you would need stout walking shoes, a ski-stick and at least one rest stop on any journey from the front door to where I would expect to find a back door. 

The same would be necessary to negotiate the upper floors with it being quite a trek to go to bed or on those frequent comfort breaks to the lavatory (that might apply just to me then). 

I attempted to walk around the three sides of what was likely to be a classic modern version of an end of terrace house but at the mid way point of the pathway a locked gate barred my way. I had not been provided with any extra keys by the selling agents to gain access for my inspection of the empty property, in fact, I had the usual two keys on the fob although on closer scrutiny they were the exact same configuration. 

I cursed under my breath at what could be an keying-up error by the agent but then again, I knew from experience where any additional keys might be hidden away inside drawers, cupboards or on strategically placed hooks in other typical hiding places. It was not a major problem. 

I clambered over the obstacle, the palisade top of the timber uprights just grazing my groin area but without discomfort. 

Standing on the small rear lawn and looking back at the house it seemed that the rooms facing me were very much lived in with curtains, ornaments and furniture and certainly occupied as someone was peering back at me from the ground floor window. I waved nervously and was shortly interrogated as to why I was standing in a private garden and invading the right to privacy and quiet enjoyment. 

The door did have a different number on it. 

I had inadvertently strayed onto another property and yet I could not fathom out how. 

Returning to the front of the house I tried the key and it worked but I was reticent about entering without shouting out “hello, is anyone in?” 

The hallway was completely empty after all. I was still a bit mystified about the previous events and started to count the windows on the ground floor externally and internally. There was exactly half the total visible number. Yet more strangeness. 

I walked into the recesses of the hallway where a door led to a shower room. It was fully enclosed.ie with no natural light. Off to the left hand side was a room of no clearly obvious description in that it lacked a focal point as in a living room hearth, any fitted units for kitchen use or other built in or fitted storage. It was likely to be a bedroom. 

On the first floor there was just one large room with a combined galley style kitchen/living space with windows giving two aspects onto the street and a small lobby leading to the top floor stairwell. 

The whole of the second floor was a bedroom with en suite bathroom and some wardrobes but again just two walls with windows. 

Having sketched the layout with external openings marked on it became abundantly clear that I was experiencing for the first time a completely new house format.

Well, I should clarify that although new to me and that is saying something as I am in my 30^th  year of working in the property sector, I had a faint recollection of having seen an old grainy photograph, bromide brown or archive black and white of just such an arrangement. 

Then it came to me. 

The correct description for the house was a "back to back".

Thanks to the logic of architects and high volume builders, driven by profit and density of development we had in fact gone full circle with a return to the bad old days synonymous with notorious and scandalous slum housing. 

Well, at £100,000 a pop the word slum may be a bit harsh but until I think of a suitably derogatory word it will be reasonable to keep it scribbled down on my site notes.