Male Models

The Humbrol Airfix factory in Hull is no more. They took away the Hawker Hunter jet that sat just inside guarding the gate some years ago. As the factory site lapsed into adandonment someone vandalised the plane by smashing the canopy over the cockpit, molested the flight-suited dummy and spray painted ' I love You John' all over the fuselage. It is a matter for much speculation who was behind the attack. At face value, and looking at the protestation of love it was either a lone and love-struck woman who had reclaimed her beau from his own infatuation with model making or a coming-out gesture for a long time but closeted admirer of John. The Hunter aircraft had been brought to Hull on a low loader lorry in three parts. I imagine that the tube of polystyrene cement used to assemble the wings to the fuselage was about as big as a road tanker. If my own model making efforts were anything to go by I would also have expected to have seen a huge elastic band around the body of the plane as extra encouragement for the parts to bond together. Wing attachment was always the critical point of making up an Airfix kit plane. The full scale version had the advantage of some bona fide heavy lifting gear. I usually had a couple of upturned beakers with which to balance the heavily glue covered pieces until that magic moment when they adhered and could be worked on further. An important decision just hovering in the background was always whether to attach the landing gear or not. Most of my aircraft were destined for suspension from a shelf or the ceiling in my bedroom and so the very fiddly parts of the landing gear could be completely ignored which was a great time, labour and anxiety saving thing. If however, I had intentions of actually playing with the completed plane as part of an elaborate battlefield diorama then the intricate web of parts had to be used. Extraction of the flimsy parts was prone to failure. Any inattention to separating the moulded parts from the sprue (yes, a real word) using a Stanley knife could be fatal for the future of the model and destine it to a life of cotton dangling rather than high value playing. The landing gear was usually in three or four parts. A main strut with axle, a smaller bracing strut, the fuselage cover and the fat wheel. The skill in assembly was to get the wheel to spin on the axle but this, for my efforts, was very rare given the excessive distribution of the adhesive which was a consequence of my nerves and self imposed pressure to do a good job. Frustration was at such a peak that many models got abandoned and trashed at this stage. There was always a place in my battlefield scenarios for a downed and crashed plane although explaining why only part built aircraft were being sent to the front would take some doing. The real life Hunter was mounted on an authentic display plinth and at a jaunty angle to suggest motion in flight. I rarely used this as a means of display with my assembled planes because I could never find or form the short slot in the base of the model in which to insert the plinth. I am pleased to say that the Hunter did find a good home after the demise of the Airfix operations and is on display at a nearby museum attraction. As for my own creations they rarely survived. The cotton supporting the hanging planes usually stretched and snapped. The dioramas were scrapped as they became too expansive for my bedroom or the dining room table. A number of aircraft got buried in the garden after simulated crash landings. The toxic emissions from a burning plastic plane were an unpleasant but very necessary part of playtime. The majority just got regularly overpainted in alternate camouflage, silver or RAF blue-grey and were thrown away as they were just plain messy. I still look forward now as an adult with the same anticipation and excitement to assembling a model plane on the occasions that they are given to me as a present at birthdays or Christmas. About half way through the process I get the same old feeling of inadequacy and doubt. At the age of 50 I can gracefully concede and confine the part built plane to the box as I have other more important things to do. I may come back to it later however.