Dog Day Afternoon

The poor defenceless squirrel that I ran down a few weeks ago must be smiling down on me this very day as I have just narrowly missed running over a small, muscular black dog around the corner from the house. It was a friday drive home from the office. Thoughts of a baked potato with salad and cheese, perhaps a lean lamb chop or whatever number of chops were on special offer at the petrol station mini market and a large glass of wine were foremost. I was attentive at the busy mini roundabout at the bottom of the street and traffic was light so I had a clear run up past the cemetery half noting the scaffolding around the Pease family mausoleum. There was the usual double parking around the Roman Catholic Church so I was proceeding at a speed well below the 30mph limit when this bullet trajectory of a dog ran straight out from the right hand pavement, into the road and disappeared out of my sight below the bonnet level. I stamped on the brakes and stopped almost instantaneously. I anticipated at absolute minimum, a  thud and yelp from the dog and traumatised screams from the small group of children at the road junction. Next best expectation, a thud and sound of splintering plastic spoiler and bumper. I got neither. No sound but also no visual of the dog. Pulling over and straddling someones driveway I jumped out to investigate. Very confusing as there were now two black dogs of the same breed looking at me. Surely I had not separated conjoined twins. I was reluctant to approach the scruffier of the dogs as this was the reckless stray and a Staffordshire breed. Short stocky body, huge head and the sort of jaws that could cause quite a bit of damage to soft tissue or amusement in the A&E Department if still physically attached and dangling from your own dangling bits. The lady owner of the other and leashed Staffie was quick to restrain the unleashed twin, if only to prevent conflict or injury to her own cared for pet. A handbag strap was quickly adapted as a lead. It required a joint effort to calm and placate the pocket rocket castrater in order to untangle the dog-bone shaped ID Tag attached to the studded leather collar. Reading the small print of the telephone number was made more difficult by the excitable nature of the dog although the combined attention of now a group of 6 adults and children helped to make him feel loved and wanted. I had to scribble down the mobile number from the tag before getting a voicemail upon dialling. The owner quickly returned the call and within a couple of minutes the family pet was retrieved, thankfully no worse off for the experience.  As I carefully pulled out onto the roadway I double checked my mirror. I cannot be sure but there appeared to be the distinct flourish of a bushy squirrel tail, albeit a bit squashed and bedraggled disappearing up a  nearby tree.